We will do it!!

A few weeks ago we read the Parsha of Yitro. I shared with my students the following story. This winter reminded me of what happened to tome during a winter like this one. I lived on a very quiet street. We played stick ball in the street and rode our bikes in the street. On my block there lived the Berger Family. The couple was older and their children had married and moved away. Mr Berger would always sit outside and watch, as all the kids were playing and riding past him. He would say Hello to us each time he saw us. He had a little dog that I think looked like him. Anyway, one very snowy day Mr. Berger called our house and I answered the phone. He asked, " Can you and your siblings do me a favor?" I answered, "Sure no problem. when should we come over?" He said, "Now".  I turned to my older brother and sister and said, "Mr. Berger needs us lets go."  They were not as excited as I thought they would be. They were annoyed at me. "Why did you say we would come over? Did you even ask him what the favor is? Maybe we do not want to clean out his attic or go through old bags of clothing with him."  They wanted to know what I had committed them to do for Mr. Berger.  That is very sound advice. You should always know what you are agreeing to do before you say you will do it.
This story it reminds me of what Bnai Yisrael did at Har Sinai. Hashem asked, "Do you want the Torah and all the Mitzvot in it?" Bnai Yisrael answers in unison the famous two words, "We will do it and we will listen". They should have asked what is in the Torah and what are the Mitzvot you are talking about. Why did they just follow without knowing the details?  To answer this questions, Rav Soloveitchik explains that we have two decison making systems. One is a very analytical mindset. We need to know all the details. The pros and cons. The gains and loses.  We review all the data and make an informed decision. That is called the רצון התחתון the lower decision making process. There is also a decision making system that works on the premise I just know it is the right thing to do. I feel it is right. I do not need details. I am going to do it. That the Rav calls the רצון העלין the upper decison making process. At Har Sinai, Bnai Yisrael answered with the רצון העלין higher decison maker process. They just knew this was the righ thing to do.
I explained to the students that in life there are times that we need to know all the details before making a choice to do or not do something. There are also times that you just know it is the right thing to do even if you do not have all the information. You should trust yourself and your feelings. That is what prompted Bnai Yisrael to answer "We will do and we will listen."

PS - Mr. Berger asked us to shovel his driveway and he paid for it too. My siblings were happy. 

Visiting An Army Base in Israel

I shared with the students that over the winter break I had the great opportunity and privilege to visit an Israeli Army base. The plan was for the visitors (us) to serve the the Chayalim hot dogs and chicken nuggets for a snack at around 8 PM.  We arrived at the base not sure what to expect since we had never been on a real army base before. These soldiers were the real deal. The night before some of them had a completed a mission in a town nearby, and they shared with us that in a few hours they would be going out on a another mission.  The base was nothing special. Cement floors and metal barracks. We started grilling the Hot dogs,chicken nuggets and preparing drinks for the soldiers. The soldiers male and female walked up to our station and we served them. They thanked us for bringing them a great treat and we thanked them for all that they do for Israel. We shared with them that we are so thankful to them for protecting the land we love. They are the reason that we can visit Israel and return to live in Israel.  At the end of the night, the tally way 150 Hot dogs, 20 boxes of nuggets, or schnitzel, as they called it and 20 bottles of Soda and Iced tea.  As we were packing up the highest ranking officer on this base approached us and shared with us two points that I will never forget.
One, the visit meant a lot to them. They get cards or gifts sometimes from people but for us to visit them on their base, on their home away from home was really special. He said "The hot dogs and the schnitzel was nice but the feeling of warmth in their hearts was more satisfying then any food. The second thing he shared with us was that every time they go out on a mission the entire group, religious or non religious, says Tefilat Hadarech. The prayer for a person going on a dangerous trip. He said the army knows that their success is in a large part due to God looking out for them.

This was a great experience for me and my family. May Hashem bless the soldiers of the Israeli army and guard and protect them.... and lest us say thank you and Amen. 

Taking a chance when opportunity knocks

In Parshat Miketz we see an example of taking the chance when opportunity knocks. The Parsha starts with Pharoh's dream about 7 fat cows and 7 skinny cows. Then a second dream about 7 healthy looking ears of grain and seven thin ears grain. In both dreams the skinny or unhealthy images eat the healthy images in his dream. Pharoah is distraught and troubled what does this dream mean? He asks his advisors but not one of them could interpret the dream. Finally one of his servants Head of Cupbearer remembers that Yosef had interpreted his dream in jail. Pharoah summons Yosef to stand before him and interpret these dreams. Yosef is rushed to the palace and given a haircut, new clothing and a good shower.  In front of Pharoah, Yosef interprets the dreams. You will have 7 good years that will be plentiful and then you will have 7 years of drought and desolation of crops. Why two dreams with the same message because it will happen very soon. Looking at the dreams Yosef's interpretation is very logical and makes sense. According to many commentators that is where the interpretation stops. The next part of Yosef's speech is a suggestion that Pharoah hire someone, smart who can make a plan to collect the surplus from the good years so Mitzrayim will have food through the bad years. Hint Hint He is talking about himself. Hire me to manage the project. This was a bold move by Yosef. It is not easy to see in the dreams where there is hint to hire a new officer, but Yosef took the change when the opportunity afforded itself. He was in the presence of the most powerful person in Egypt. Yosef took the chance to promote himself and it worked. He was led around the Egypt on a chariot with people calling out this is the viceroy of Egypt.  This is an example for us to take the chance when the opportunity presents itself maybe this why Hashem put you in that place.
Shabbat Shalom

Yosef's Transformation

In the Shabbat Assembly, I spoke to the students about the transformation that happened to Yosef from Potiphar's house to the jail. In Potiphar's house he was a slave but not in a jail cell. He was chased after by Potipahr's wife and when he refused her advances she turned the tables on him. She screamed and claimed Yosef had attacked her when no one else was in the house. Potiphar returns home and he sentences Yosef to jail. Yosef is not able to even plead his case. He was quiet and reserved. He receives no trial.  I shared with the students that in Jewish Law cases are brought before a Beit Din for judgement and in the United States every person has the right to their day in court.  The evidence must prove guilt not the feeling or emotions of one person. Once in jail there was a transformation. The pasuk (39:21) states that Hashem gave Yosef "Chesed" and and put "Chan" favor in the eyes of the warden of the jail. I am interpreting this pasuk to mean that Yosef was able to be himself and show his charisma and honesty. The warden was able figure out the real personality of Yosef. He made Yosef into the leader of all the prisoners. This might not seem like such a great position but it was a position of leadership. This is where the transformation of Yosef from a depressed slave sold by his brothers to a leader who will rule Mitzrayim begins.
Sometimes in the most strange environments or situations we learn about ourselves and transform ourselves for the future.

Yaakov to Yisrael - The name Change and life change

At the Shabbat asembly for Vayishlach we talked about a game changer, the name change of Yaakov to Yisrael. Based on a Dvar Torah from Rabbi David Fohrman we walked through Yaakov life and how his personality changed with his name. When we are first introduced to Yaakov at his birth we are told he was holding onto the heel of Esav, the עקב. The heel is shaped like a "U" and through out Yaakov early years he approached life in a round about way. For example, the blessing from his father Yitzchok was not a straight forward episode. He went a very round about way to receive the Berachot. We hear Esav cry out to his father that "Hi is   named correctly Yaakov he tricked me many times" Perek 27:36
 וַיֹּאמֶר הֲכִי קָרָא שְׁמוֹ יַעֲקֹב, וַיַּעְקְבֵנִי זֶה פַעֲמַיִם
 Another example of his Yaakov tendencys  is his reaction to his dream of the ladder and angels. Hashem promises him that he will become a great nation and that Hashem will protect him. Yaakov 's response could have been thank you very much. His response was conditional if you do the following things for me than I am all yours. Again he was not direct. In Lavan's house his marriage to Rachel was round about etc...
When does all this change? Once Hashem says your name is Yisrael his approach is different. He is more direct. Thename  Yisrael, ישראל  has in the first 3 letters the word ישר  "straight." or direct. Look what happens in the next episode of the Parsha. Yaakov meets with Esav his brother, who wanted to kill him over 20 years ago. Yaakov could have traveled back home without going through Seir, Esav home, but he did not. He went straight to Esav and met him face to face. Later Hashem promises him a great nation an he accepts it without any conditions. Yaakov is embracing his new name and attitude of being direct. We could we could learn a lot from this approach. If we have a conflict or argument with some we should have direct conversation about the issue and not go around it. If we need some help or need to give advice be direct, be nice but also be direct.  Yisrael (Yaakov) learned over his lifetime that being straight froward works much better that avoiding. 

Parsha Summary and Questions

Fleeing from Esav, Yakov leaves Be'er Sheva and sets out towards Charan, the home of his mother's family. After a fourteen year stopover in the Yeshiva of Shem and Ever, he resumes his journey and comes to Mount Moriah, the place where his father Yitzchak was brought as an offering, and the future site of the Beit Hamikdash. He lays down to sleep and has a prophetic dream of angels ascending and descending a ladder between heaven and earth. Hashem promises him the Land of Israel, that he will found a great nation and that he will be guarded by Divine protection everywhere. Yakov awakes and vows to build an altar there and tithe all that he will receive. Then he travels to Charan and meets his cousin Rachel at the well. He arranges with her father, Lavan, to work seven years for her hand in marriage, but Lavan deceives Yakov and substitutes Rachel's elder sister, Leah. Yakov commits himself to work another seven years in order to also marry Rachel. Leah bears him four sons - Reuven, Shimon, Levi and Yehuda - the first Tribes of Israel. Rachel is jealous that she cannot conceive, and gives her handmaiden Bilhah to Yakov. Bilhah bears Dan and Naftali. Leah also gives Yakov her handmaiden Zilpah, who bears Gad and Asher. Leah now gives birth to Yissachar, Zevulun, and a daughter, Dina. Hashem finally blesses Rachel with a son, Yosef. Yakov decides to leave Lavan, but Lavan, aware of the wealth Yakov has made for him, is reluctant to let him go, and concludes a contract of employment with him. Lavan tries again to swindle Yakov but is unsuccessful, and Yakov becomes extremely wealthy. Six years later, Yakov, aware that Lavan has become resentful of his wealth, takes advantage of his father-in-law's temporary absence and flees with his family. Lavan pursues them but is warned by Hashem not to harm them. Yakov and Lavan agree to a covenant and Lavan returns home. Yakov continues on his way to face his brother Esav.

Parshat Vayetzah
Question for Grades 1 - 2

1.Upon what did  Yakov lay his head to rest? ( 28:11) 
2. What did Yakov do that the other shepreds were not able to do? (29:10)  

3. How did Lavan greet Yakov? (29:13) 

4. What did Yakov say he wanted in return for working for Lavan? (29:18) 

5. How many daughters did Lavan have, and what were their names?  

6. How did Lavan trick Yakov? (29:24) 

Questions for Grades 3- 5 

1. What two promises did Hashem make to Yakov in his dream? (28:13-14)  

2. What was Lavan’s answer to Yakov when asked why he tricked him? (29:26)  

3. How many additional years did Yakov work to marry Rachel? (29:27) 

BONUS - How long did Yakov need to wait until he married Rachel? (Look closely at 29:28)

4. What was the name of  Leah’s daughter? (30:21) 

5. What areTeraphim? Who stole them(Rashi 31:19)  

6.What did Yakov say would happen to the person who had the idols? (31:32) 

The blink of an Eye..Follow your instincts

At the Shabbat Assembly last week I discussed with the students the power of a "blink". That moment in time when your think without thinking. You make decision based on what you see in that instance. In the Parhsa of Tolodot we have the episode of Yitzchok's blessings to Yaakov. Let's look for Yitzchok "blink" moment.  Realizing the he was getting older and about to die, Yitzchok sends Esav to prepare food for him so he can eat and then give him a Beracha before he dies. Esav leaves and Rivkah tells Yaakov now is the time to get the Blessings. Yaakov bring the food into his father's tent and the reaction right away from Yitzchok is, "Who are you?" Yitzchok's first response was how can this be it is too quick for all the food to prepared. Then Yitzchok starts a process and he talks to this son, feels the skin of this son, smells the scent of this son, and is convinced by his investigation that this is indeed Esav and he blesses accordingly. Almost immediately right after Yaakov leave the tent Esav walks in with all the food and tells his father he is ready. Yitzchok is shocked and afraid. He was right his first inclination was a correct one. The first person was Yaakov not Esav. Although the first born blessing needed to go to Yaakov as part of Hashem's plan for the future of Bnei Yisrael we can still learn that the "blink" is right most of the time.  There are times each day that we need to make decisions and we need to trust our instincts and make those
decisions. It could happen on a test when we see and questions and are not sure about the answer. Always go with your first choice. It could happen on the bus when you are not sure if it is the right thing to do.  Your first feeling about it is most probably correct. It happens when we talk and play with our friends. Should I say this or play it this way? always go with what you feel in your gut, in to stomach.  To quote form Malcom Gladwell's website "Blink reveals that great decision makers aren’t those who process the most..."